


The Children of God and a Few Other Things

by babiebabble



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Crowley steals a fucking baby, Ineffable Bureaucracy (Good Omens), Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Michael Sheen I’m begging you, The Dad Au, please read it-
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-06-26 15:08:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19770781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babiebabble/pseuds/babiebabble
Summary: “No.”“Yes.”“Already?”“Yes.”“And it’s up to me?”“Yes.”“Y’know, this really isn’t my scene.”“Your scene, your starring role. Take it.”“Like you said, times are changing,”“They’re coming to an end for a start.”“Why me?”“Because they love you down there.”**Both the Dowling family and Young family had yellow haired baby boys. Same night, same place. There was one thing missing, though.The antichrist.





	1. Chapter 1

“Call Aziraphale!”

” _Calling Aziraphale..... We’re sorry all mobile phone lines-“_

 _“_ Shit. Shit. _SHIT!_ Why _me.”_

Crowley slammed his hands against the steering wheel of his bentley. He lets out a deep breath and continues to drive through the rain. He’s going faster than anyone should, or would dare to go on a wet road, but that’s not what he’s focused on right now.

He’s focusing on what will happen when he hands over the baby to the nuns. Simple, they’ll exchange him with the ambassador’s child. And after that they’ll raise him. And after that, he’ll grow to destroy the world, bring Armageddon, and then heaven and hell will fight to the death. After that, either eternity of hellfire or holy harmonies.

He’s known this for thousands of years. But knowing about something, and being the indirect cause of it are two different things.

”But, _why me?”_

_”Because you deserve it, Darling.”_

He almost completely swerves off the road because of the sudden voice coming from his radio. The voice of Freddie calling him darling hasn’t been something he’s heard recently; caught him by surprise.

”Oh, hello, um,” he stops to think on how to address them. “Lord.”

”I see you’ve gotten the child.”

”Oh yes, certainly.” Crowley takes a small look in his rear view mirror just to make sure the basket is still there.

”I’ll send you your duties, sweets.”

”Oh, sir, there’s really _no need-“_

But it was too late, his vision was already being fogged. He hated when they did this; it was as if they couldn’t catch up and just say what they wanted him to do.

He pulls out of it just in time to pull the car to a hard right, almost not missing the large truck that was about to hit him head on. The only problem is, this time, he went completely off. The car slides in between two trees, absolutely ruining the paint job and also managing to be rough enough to wake the child. 

With the radio now back on, Bohemian Rhapsody had finished and in came the snapping of Killer Queen. He decides to turn the radio completely off before grabbing the basket from the backseat and setting it in the front.

In a split moment decision, Crowley lifts the closest side of it to see the small, blonde, baby he’d been tasked to give to the nuns. This was the Antichrist. The being that was to bring about the end of the world.

”You don’t know the headache you’re causing me.”

Crowley closed it back and put the car in reverse, turning around and going the opposite way from where he was supposed to go. He was a demon, after all. Demons don’t follow rules.


	2. Chapter 2

He basically kicked the door of Aziraphale’s bookshop completely open, despite the sign on it saying it was closed.

Basket in hand, he strolled in but the door quickly shut and locked back behind him.

Aziraphale ran into the room, but when his eyes landed on Crowley his whole posture changed. With a sigh he walked over.

”Hello, Crowley. It’s been,” he paused. “A good while.” He glanced down and noticed the basket at Crowley’s side.

”Listen, I know there’s a lot we need to talk about, but we need to _hurry._ ” He sat it on Aziraphale’s desk, making papers fall to the floor. He would have picked them up if there weren’t more pressed things.

”My dear, what is it? Why don’t you sit down?”

”Because, Angel, we don’t have the time to sit down; do you know what’s in that?” He gestured to the basket. 

Aziraphale’s face went blank. He looked towards it, then back to Crowley. “I really hope I don’t.”

”You _do,_ you know exactly what it is. So, c’mon let’s go,”

”You can’t just do that! Crowley, you stole the child of Satan! This isn’t something small. You’re going against-“

He threw his hands up. “What? The great plan or whatever you call it? Whatever is supposed to happen doesn’t need to happen! There doesn’t need to be this,”

He made a lot of fighting motions with his hands, while desperately looking at his friend. Aziraphale ran a hand through his hair and looked towards the basket once more.

”Look, I’m already an hour late, there was no other baby, there not _going to be_ another baby. It’s done. Are you coming with me or not?”

Thunder struck outside, cause the lights to flicker and the shelves to rattle. The Antichrist started to cry.

“No.”

Crowley felt his heart stop.

”Angel, _please,_ I’m literally begging you, isn’t that how it usually works?”

“This is dangerous! Do you know the trouble you’d get into? As much as I hate to say it, I cannot help you with this.”

Aziraphale went to put a hand on Crowley’s shoulder, but he pulled away before he could.

”Alright, Angel,” he grabbed the basket from the desk and started to walk back out the door. “I’ll see you around.” 

He made himself keep looking forward, because he knew if he looked back, he wouldn’t be able to leave. The Bentley was still running and still looked like it’d been through hell. He aggressively pulled open the driver door and fell into his seat. The basket stayed in his lap but his sunglasses were quickly took off and thrown on the dashboard. He gently pushed his fingers to his eyelid and rubbed, because he couldn’t and wouldn’t let the sting in his eyes get in the way of what he was doing. The Bentley was out of park, now in drive, and Crowley had his foot on the gas, but he wasn’t pushing down. He felt like there was _something_ stopping him.

A small _knock knock_ was heard on the passenger side window. There stood Aziraphale, motioning for the window to be rolled down. He snapped his fingers and down it went.

”What did I forget?”

”My dear, you didn’t forget anything. I have, say, changed my mind. But! This is only so you don’t get into big trouble! Who knows the things they’ll do to you if they find out what’s happened.”

”Oh, they already definitely know, no doubt.”

”What-“

”Angel, just get in the damn car!”

He opens the door and places himself gingerly in the passenger seat. 

“Also, if you wouldn’t mind, hold this.” Crowley passes the basket to Aziraphale, who reacts as expected. Extremely, extremely, nervous.

“Where are we going?” 

“Away from here, somewhere small where they won’t think to look for us.” A smile appeared on his face. “And I know just the man to ask.”

He slammed his foot into the gas pedal and roared down the street. Aziraphale grabbed ahold to whatever he could and sat back. It wasn’t long before they got to where they needed to go.

”Stay here, I’ll be back soon.” He put his sunglasses back on and opened his door.

”No, no, no. I’m coming with you.” Before anything could be said, he stepped out, baby still in hand. Crowley hopped out and knocked on the door several times. Aziraphale recognized the place, but said nothing.

He knocked several times again, not caring if anyone was woken up. Eventually, a older woman answered the door.

”Hello, we need to speak with Mr. Shadwell. It’s important.”

She smiled at the two and welcomed them in. They followed her up the stairs to his office. Crowley wasted no time, opening the door and making his way towards him.

”Hello, Mr. Shadwell, you see we haven’t much time. You know a good bit about things, do you mind telling us a place where it’s very calm, quiet, not much happens? We need to know.”

Shadwell looked between the two of them before saying, “Mr. Crowley, I didn’t know you knew that southern pansy, much less was with ‘em.” 

Crowley had a blank expression until the words made sense. Then, his whole face turned red. 

“No, no. That wasn't what was asked. Please tell us where we can find a small, quiet place, where _nothing happens.”_

He grabbed a paper nearby and started reading through it.

”Can’t help ya there. I don’t know very much about places where nuthin’ happens.”

Crowley rolled his eyes. “Of course, of course.” 

“Well,” Madame Tracy’s voice picked up from the hallway outside of the room. “there’s always Tadfield.”


	3. Chapter 3

  
The three men turned their attention to her.

“Where?”

“Tadfield, it’s very small and also very home-like. Sweet people. I have a niece that used to live there.”

Crowley and Aziraphale met eyes before the Angel smiled. “Well, it seems like a wonderful place. Would you mind giving directions?”

***

They followed the directions that were given and finally got to where they needed to be. And as if it were a miracle, there was a small house right on the corner with a **FOR SALE** sign in the front yard.

“Alright, let’s go.”

Aziraphale lightly grabbed his arm to keep him in the car. “We can’t just walk in. It’s for sale, not sold. There could still be people in there.”

“There’s not.”

“And how do you know?”

He didn’t answer, he just winked. This made Aziraphale very nervous, but he didn’t ask what the wink meant. Crowley put his glasses back on once again, stepped out and looked at the scene. It was exactly how Madame Tracy had described it. Small and quiet. This wouldn’t be the place where people would think something were to happen. It was perfect.

Something to the side caught his eye. It was another car, pulling into the driveway of the house almost next door. Out stepped a small woman with blonde hair, in her arms she held something wrapped in a blanket. Next to her stood a gentleman with dark hair and an unlit pipe.

He was about to look away, but he locked eyes with the woman. She just smiled and nodded, then made her way into the house.

“My dear?” Aziraphale stood by the fence of the house, looking at the gate. There was nothing stopping him from going in, he just didn’t want to. Crowley sighed and pushed it open.

“After you.”

“Thank you,”

The yard was very pretty. Green grass, a small flower bed, and a lot of small yard decorations. _Very_ _home-like indeed_ , thought Aziraphale.

Crowley turned the knob on the door and let himself in. There was a light scent of coffee, despite there not being any coffee anywhere. Almost the whole house was cleaned out, but that was to be expected. He pulled out a chair at the dining table and sat down.

“So?”

“Hm?” Aziraphale gently sat down the basket in front of him. “So, what?”

“What are you thinking?”

“I’m feeling a tiny bit panicked if you’d like me to be honest, but it’s certainly gave me a rush!”

The demon pinched the bridge of his nose. “About the house, Angel. What do you think about the house?”

“Oh! Well, it’s certainly nice. Needs a few things, but that’s alright. I can go back to the bookshop and-“

“Is that the best idea?”

Aziraphale pulled a chair across from him. “My dear boy, I have much in that bookshop that is very valuable and is very sentimental. I’ll be going back soon, that’s for sure.”

Crowley just nodded and ran a hand through this long hair. “That’s understandable. Guess I should go grab a few things from my flat too.” He nodded to himself.

“In the meantime, I suppose we find something to do with a child.”

“There can always just not be one.”

“But there is one. They’re in the basket.”

They sat in silence for a moment, just looking at the basket.

“Should we take them out?” Aziraphale pulls his eyes away to look at Crowley.

“Be my guest.”

He stands up and gently opens one side. His face goes from concern to confusion and back.

Crowley stands and looks in. “Is there a problem?”

Aziraphale goes to pick him up and out, sliding the basket out of the way. “This is the Antichrist?”

“Yep.”

“Oh, well I was expecting something,” he pauses. “a tad bit more threatening?” The angel holds the child up, both of them staring at each other. Then it began to cry. Loudly. “Crowley I can’t do this. I don’t know anything about children. What do they eat? What do they do? I’m very confused.” He looks to Crowley desperately and starts to sit the baby down.

“No, that’s not how you hold it. You have to cradle it, er whatever they do.” He takes it from Aziraphale and lays it down across his arms. “See? Now it’s happy.”

“Don’t you have to feed it?”

“Guess we’ll find out.”

Silence.

“What are we going to do with them?”

Crowley gave Aziraphale a guilty smile. “I didn’t think that far ahead.”

Aziraphale didn’t look very surprised.

“I’m sure there’s something about children somewhere in a book or whatever else, raising a kid can’t be that hard, humans have been doing it for years.”

As soon as the baby fell back asleep, Crowley placed him back in his basket. It was the only thing to keep him in at the time. Tomorrow, maybe, if he really felt like it, he could always just go pick up a few things. It wouldn’t be too hard. It’s just a few things here and there to make sure that, since it has a “normal” upbringing, it might not know that Satan himself is its goddamn father.

There were no beds, or sofas, or chairs, or anything really to sleep on besides the dinner table the owners left. It was quick to see why, it didn’t look very pleasing. The house itself was wonderful, a very large bedroom with two walk-in closets and a bathroom attached, open kitchen, spacious living area, everything Crowley loved. He knew that Aziraphale, on the other hand, liked to have cozy and cramped spaces. His bookstore had been small, all the shelves very close to each other along with his backroom still being very tiny. He enjoyed it though, so Crowley couldn’t say anything.

***

The next morning, at the crack of daylight, he told Aziraphale they would take turns. He would watch the baby while Aziraphale went to his shop and grabbed whatever he needed and hoped he didn’t need the whole thing. Then, Aziraphale would sit and wait for Crowley to get everything he would need. It was a simple plan. They decided it would be easier for Crowley to leave first, since he wouldn’t take very long. He was fine with this, so he strutted out to the Bentley and drove away, leaving Aziraphale alone.

No one was out, considering it was about 6 a.m. but, when he got back to London, he had already gotten stuck in traffic twice.

When he threw open the door to his apartment, he started bagging, clothes, papers, whatever else he could get his hands on. But, his TV turns on. He dropped everything and quickly kicked it under his desk before Hastur could see him.

“Oh. Hello.” He smiled at him and tried not to look suspicious.

“Hello, Crowley. Beelzebub told me to pass a message to you. They said,” he pulls out a crumpled up piece of paper. “Thank you for delivering the Antichrist. The end is upon us, and hell will prevail. The prince of hell, Lord Beelzebub.” He read it all in a flat voice, no emotion at all.

Crowley sat confused, but spoke anyway. “Of course,” he thought to himself, _what would I do now?_ The answer was: be That Bitch.

“I mean, I think I did a wonderful job. The nuns did whatever they were supposed to do and now we just wait. How long? Eleven years? You did say Ligur would give his right arm to do what I was doing, and now I understand why.”

Hastur just nodded.

“Anyway, great talking to you! I may or may not see you soon, who knows. Alright, ciao,”

He cut the TV back off and grabbed his things. When he walked over to his plants, they started shaking. He smiled to himself and started grabbing all the ones he could. Then, after that, he turned to his painting of Mona Lisa. It clicked as he unlocked it and grabbed the cup with caution, better safe than sorry. He walked out of his apartment with the holy water wrapped in a large blanket and stuffed in his bag, all of his clothes, papers, his favorite mug, anything important, and many, many, plants. He sits it all in the back seat and goes to call Aziraphale to tell him what’s happened, but he hangs up because he remembered that Aziraphale doesn’t have a phone.

***

Aziraphale sits at the counter with baby laid on a small blanket in front of him. It hasn’t cried, just keep looking around. He was really wanting Crowley to get back, who had already been gone for a few hours. It was starting to worry him, but he could still sense him on earth. Aziraphale was about to miracle himself something to eat, but there was the honking of a horn outside. He put the baby back in the basket, then it started to cry. He told himself he’ll deal with that in a second and opened the front door to see all of the commotion.

“Angel! Come help me get all of this stuff out and sit it down, please.”  
Crowley was grabbing handfuls and handfuls of plastic bags that had all sorts of things in them. He rushed outside and started to help.

“Why’d you buy so much?”

“Figured we’d need it.”

He took notice of the big box sitting on the floor.

“What’s that?”

“A bassinet.”

“What’s that?”

“A baby bed.”

“Oh,”

He lifts the large box and starts to bring it inside when the woman from (almost) next door says something from her yard. Aziraphale looks toward her and see that she’s looking at him.

“Pardon!” He says, hopefully loud enough to hear.

“I asked if you gentlemen needed help!”

Crowley goes to grab more bags. He was about to say that they didn’t need any help, but Aziraphale got there first.

“That would be lovely! Thank you so much!”

She walked over and started to help grab things from out of the back.

“Are you boys the new owners?”

“Yes,” Crowley said. “we are. Nice place.”

“Yes! It’s very nice here. Also a very nice house! The other owners loved it, but they wanted a change of scenery.”

“Ah, well you could say it’s the same for us!” Aziraphale smiles at her as he started to walk inside.

“So,” she turned to Crowley. “first kid?” She looked down at the bag of diapers.

“It is actually, they’re very new. We felt like we central London was- a bit too much.”

She smiled and nodded. “That’s understandable, we got our son last night. It was a bit odd though, the nuns were acting on edge, but everything was fixed up, and now we got our little Adam.”

Everything clicked in Crowley’s head at once. But he couldn’t say anything. She gathered the last bags and walked towards the house.

He grabbed his bag along with some of his plants and followed her.

Inside, Aziraphale was busy putting the food and such into the fridge and the shelves. The baby had once again gone quiet. Was a baby supposed to sleep that much? He hoped so.

“If you need anything else, I’m here.” Her smile stayed.

“Well, we’re still relatively new,” Aziraphale glanced at Crowley. “fathers. I’m not sure if you could help with that but-“

“Oh, I certainly can. Years before my son was born my mum taught me everything I would need to know. I hated it then, but now I see it comes in handy. So, what do you need to know?”

Aziraphale blushes and points to the bag with the diapers.

***

“There, see it’s not that hard, is it?”

He smiled wide and proudly. “It isn’t!”

Two hours worth of baby changing, feeding, and play time lessons and they both seem to have gotten the hang of it.

“Alright then, I’ll be on my way, you have our number, call us if you need anything!”

“Got it,” Crowley leaned against the table and gave her a small wave of goodbye. She was almost out the door when she turned back. “Oh my! I’ve forgot to ask, what’s their name?”

Both Aziraphale and Crowley’s brains went blank.  
They’ve forgot to give them a name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They certainly have their hands full :’)  
> Also turns out neither of them are being hunted down, huh.  
> Also x2 sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes !! I’m very bad at that  
> But thank you for reading xoxo


	4. Chapter 4

“Well, we haven’t given him a name yet. It’s part of my family’s religion; we wait a week before naming them, to give it more value!” Aziraphale smiled.

“Yes, what he said.” Crowley nods.

“Oh! That sounds very nice,” she steps out the door. “I’ll be next door, drop by anytime you need anything!”

“Thank you, Mrs. Young!”

They learned her name when she started talking about her husband, son, and her house. Crowley wanted it to be a short-lived conversation, but Aziraphale kept asking her questions. He found that funny, considering he did the exact same thing, but is now in _this_ situation. His role as a demon hadn’t been very satisfying, since the only “evil” he could do was cause a little trouble. The M25 was the greatest, also the most evil, thing he’d done.

It was nice here, but he would never say it. A life with Aziraphale was always something to think about. But not in a human way, no sir.

It’s a shame he fell; when there was no one around, he’d look out the windows of his flat and admire the stars he made. That was his favorite thing about being an angel, he’s not sure what the pros of being a demon are, besides having all the best musicians. He would call the snake eyes a plus, though.

“Please, call me Deidre. And it’s my pleasure. Have a good day!” And she was finally gone.

“I like her.” Aziraphale kept smiling to himself before he looked back up to see Crowley. “I like our neighbors. Don’t you?”

He shrugged. “Hey, was that actually a thing?”

“Was what a thing, my dear?”

“The thing with the name.”

“Oh, not that I know of.”

“Ah, alright.”

Aziraphale didn’t stop smiling. “Well then, I should go grab my things. I’ll be back soon.”

“Don’t you need the keys?”

“No, no, I don’t need any keys. I’ll just pop over and grab what I need, and get back.”

Crowley just looked at him for a second before realizing that he meant teleportation. That just made him groan.

“Why didn’t I think of that.”

Aziraphale gave Crowley a very quick, very small wink, before disappearing. It made his whole face turn to a bright red, and he was happy no one was there to see it. What did it mean? He wasn’t for sure.

He looked into the basket that still held the baby and gently lifted him out. “We have a bed for you, but no bed for me. Typical.”

It just looked at him, didn’t make any noise, didn’t even blink for a good minute.

“You’re a strange one.”

Crowley placed him back in and grabbed the basket along with box the bassinet was in and walked into the second bedroom. This had to be the best place for it. Sitting criss-cross on the floor, he popped open the box and got to work. Demon powers or not, he could do this himself, it wouldn’t be that hard.

**

Aziraphale returned back into his small shop and started grabbed what he needed. His bag would do nicely to carry everything in. He takes his time folding his clothes and dusting off his important books before lightly sitting them in the bottom of the bag, along with his favorite mug, that matched Crowley’s. The demon had gotten them as a joke sometime in the 90s. He gathered other things like pens, priceless jewelry he’d collected over the years, and finally, his coat. The bag reminded him of Mary Poppins’; he could put whatever he’d like in it and still have all the room in the world. He could take the whole shop with him if he’d like, but he didn’t. There was no reason to. He wouldn’t be saying goodbye to the shop forever, anyway. Just for a little at a time, when everything settles down, he’ll be back. Yes, that’s what will happen.

The thought of him staying- _or_ _living_ \- with Crowley didn’t really come to mind. He didn’t try to think about it. He wasn’t opposed to the thought, but they were working together now. Did that make them friends? He had already told the nice woman almost next door that they were fathers, did she assume that they were together? Well, of course she did, and it’s not her fault. Who wouldn’t assume two “men” with a baby, moving into a new house weren’t together?

He let out a sign and sat down on the small sofa he had sitting by the window.

He looked down at the sofa, then at the bag, then had a wonderful idea.

**

When he transported back to the house, he heard loud cursing and a good bit of clanging. When he saw the light on in one of the bedrooms, he walked over to look inside.

He saw Crowley sitting on the floor with two pieces of plastic in his hands with a large piece of paper unwrapped in front of him.

“They go together. It says right here that _they go together_.” He tried to force them into each other.

Aziraphale cleared his throat to get his attention. Crowley dropped the plastic pieces and quickly turned around but his face looked pleased when he saw Aziraphale.

“Oh, Angel. Welcome back,” he turned back to his plastic. “got everything you needed, I hope.”

Aziraphale reached in front of him and grabbed a similar part, then took a piece from Crowley. The two clicked together.

He just rolled his eyes at him and connected them to more of the bassinet. “So, I was thinking about names.”

Aziraphale felt a little taken aback by this, for whatever reason. But he sat beside Crowley and raised an eyebrow, gesturing for him to continue.

“I was thinking Cane.”

Aziraphale pursed his lips.

“Maybe something a little different. Judas?”

“No, he doesn’t look like a Judas.” Crowley smiled to himself. “I just wonder why.”

There was only the sound of him clicking pieces together with the help of Aziraphale before he spoke back up.

“Michael? Maybe if we gave him a name like that it’ll even it out.”

“Angel, I doubt a name will help, but if you’re going for something like that, why Michael? You don’t even like them.”

Aziraphale nodded, then went back to thinking. “Raphael?”

Crowley stopped. He hadn’t heard that name in more than six thousand years.

“Who?”

The angel smiled. “Raphael! He was an archangel at one point; not sure what happened to him, though.”

He just nodded. “I like the sound of that one. Is that it?”

“I think so!”

The last piece was put in place, so a blanket was laid in the bottom of the bed, a fluffy one, and even one of those things that spin with the little animals on it. Crowley thought he did a great job.

He lifts the baby out of the crib and sits him in it. Raphael seemed to like it.

“Does he need anything?” Aziraphale looked over Crowley’s shoulder.

“Not that I know of. I fed him while you were gone.”

“Didn’t Mrs. Young- er, Deidre say something else about feeding them?”

Crowley turned on the spinny thing and shut off the light. He and Aziraphale walked back into the kitchen and sat in their spots at the table. “Burping? Yeah, I’ve gotten everything taken care of.”

Aziraphale looked down at his hands and forced down a smile.

“What.”

“Hm?”

“You know what I’m talking about. What are you thinking.”

“Well, I just think that’s it’s nice that you’ve gotten the hang of all of this so quickly.”

Crowley took off his glasses and carelessly threw them onto the table. “Shuttup.”

“So, this is how it’s going to be for now, hm?”

He yawns and leans back in his chair. “Seems that way. Is that a problem?”

Aziraphale didn’t want to lie, and say it wasn’t, but that wouldn’t make it the opposite any true. He wanted to be there for Crowley, since this would be very hard to do alone. So, he found middle ground. “For now, no.”

And it was left at that. Crowley asked Aziraphale what he’d grabbed from his shop, only seeing his bag sitting in front of him. Aziraphale stood up and lightly grabbed his forearm to lead him to the living area. The bag was sat the on the floor sideways. He looked at the the demon.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Aziraphale opened his bag and started to pull out the sofa from his bookshop. The whole thing. Crowley’s eyes widened as he watched him tug the side out. He moved to help, pulling the bag in the opposite direction. When it was all the way out, they helped each other move it to the desired area.

“I thought you’d like this.”

“You brought a whole sofa just for me?”

“I did. I know you enjoy sleeping.”

Crowley didn’t wait any longer to completely collapse into it. It felt like heaven to him; all the familiar fabric against his skin. This is where Crowley always, _always_ , sat when he visited Aziraphale. His heart was warmed by what he’d done for him. He would hug him if he had the nerve.

“Thank you so much, Angel.”

“It’s no problem, my dear boy.”

Crowley felt his eyelids getting heavy, but the sound of Raphael crying from the other room made them open right back up. He sighed and stood.  
“I got it,” he mumbled, and made his way towards them.

Aziraphale sat down and watched as Crowley walked like he didn’t know how, and tied his hands together in his lap. The crying stopped, and so did the noise all together, other than the things outside. It was nice here, something he could get used to. Hopefully, something both of them could get used to- quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aziraphale smiles a lot here !! I just love to picture him happy, always trying to make the best of situations !  
> Also,, Crowley is a good dad you can’t change my mind.  
> Thank you for reading !! xoxo


	5. A/N !!

Hello my beautiful people !

I’m very sorry if you were expecting an update, I know I missed yesterday :’) 

But ! I’ve been having a bit of a writers block and I also wanted to say that I’ve decided to make a upload schedule !! 

I will be trying to upload every Friday, but I’m not sure the time,

School for me will be starting soon and I’ll be pretty busy with that, but don’t fear ! I will still try my very best to update every Friday, unless something comes up. If that happens, please forgive me ! If I know that I’ll be busy, I’ll try to write a new chapter early and post it before Friday, or whenever I return from whatever I was doing.

Thank you for understanding, and thank you very much for reading ! I’ve been thinking about this AU for a while anyway ;)

✨AngelxxDust✨


	6. Chapter 6

When Crowley woke back up from his nap, the first thing he saw was Aziraphale sitting at the end of the sofa with a book in one hand and a cup in the other. He looked soft, and very unbothered. Crowley turned his head to look out the window, and saw it was dark. He lightly kicked his friend’s thigh to get his attention, but it startled him. A bit of whatever he was drinking splashed on the page of whatever he was reading. Aziraphale didn’t look mad, though. He sat down his drink and looked to Crowley

“Sorry- how long was I asleep?” He asked.

The only problem with sleeping was that, since he was a demon and didn’t need sleep, his body wouldn’t wake him up whenever he was done needing it. Once, he slept a whole century, mostly because he wanted to; but, he didn’t mean for his nap to be _that_ long.

“Oh, only a few hours. You looked very comfortable.” Aziraphale looked down at the page where the stain had set on the old paper. Crowley sat himself up and lightly ran a hand over the page, making it disappear.

“Oh, thank you.” Aziraphale smiled. Crowley nodded and turned away, he didn’t like that he would have to get up to grab his glasses, so he looked at the window away from Aziraphale and acted as if there were something interesting.

Aziraphale had gotten used to him wearing glasses on and off, but his snake eyes caught something in him. He noticed little changes overtime; nothing dramatic, they didn’t stay the same. They would go from their usual orange to orange with small specks of green, or a lighter orange than they were before. Small changes were big changes when you’ve known someone for long enough, and Crowley is always changing. Whether it be his hair, his clothes, his voice, or his name, something was always different.

Aziraphale, on the other hand, tended to keep things repetitive. He owned one good coat since 1700s and he wasn’t planning on not wearing it any time soon. He found comfort in the past, and enjoyed keeping things, well, traditional.

You see, the word “traditional” to Aziraphale is completely different from the way humans see it. Not as a way to harm people who aren’t traditional. He sees it as, keeping it the way things have always been for _himself_. He doesn’t oppose new ideas, or technology, or anything, really; he just thinks it’s easier for him to stay in the past. When he said, _“you go to fast_ _for_ _me_ , _Crowley.”_ He didn’t really mean that he was taking their acquaintanceship too fast, but Crowley has always been with the times.

This whole situation seemed like a dream, like it wasn’t actually happening. He knew that Gabriel would somehow try to get in contact with him, to ask him what had happened to the Antichrist or how he’d been dealing with Crowley. Aziraphale couldn’t tell him that the three of them were living together in a comfy house somewhere in a small… would you even call it a town? He hadn’t seen much of it. He would have to come up with something.

“Oh! I almost forgot to tell you,” Crowley smiled one of his signature _I’m probably up to some trouble smiles_. “Hell doesn’t suspect a thing. I just gotta say I’ve been keeping an eye on “The Antichrist” and, well, we should be fine.”

Aziraphale slowly closes his book and sits it beside him. “So, what you’re saying is, they think that a different baby is the Antichrist? But how? Wasn’t there supposed to be two babies?”

“Yes! And there was, it just wasn’t ours. The odd woman next door? Remember how she said he got her baby delivered by a bunch of nuns? They were _the_ nuns; she just happened to be there the same time the American was.”

“She isn’t odd, and are you sure? That definitely seems like a large coincidence. And if I’m getting everything your saying, are you telling me that her son isn’t her son?”

“Look, that part doesn’t matter, the part that does matter is that the end of the world can be stopped. Isn’t that good?” He says all of this while he runs his hands through his hair, gathering it all up and putting it in a ponytail to keep it out of his face. And because he thinks they look nice on him.

“It is, but I just feel like this is too easy. Like you said, we’ll have to check up on the other boy too. It’ll be difficult, always being here, but constantly having to go back and forth. Are you sure this is the best option?”

“I am, but if you’re not, do whatever you’d like. I’m sure I could do this myself.”

Aziraphale knew he was lying, his voice and posturing told it all. He wasn’t sure what to say next. Comforting wouldn’t be a good choice, and reassuring him might not be what he’s going for. So, he asked another question. “Won’t it be difficult? Going back and forth from here to hell? I’m assuming heaven would like me to do the same,”

“No, it won’t be. Only maybe monthly check ins. I’ll tell them what’s going on every, say, two months.”

”Okay,”

Aziraphale looked to Crowley, then to his lap. It stayed quiet.

The two had both been used to a lot of noise, so it was a bit to settle into. Crowley liked it quiet, but to an extent. Hell was always loud, cramped, and dirty. That’s why he preferred his flat open and always clean. Something that Crowley always had on his mind, though, was music. When he was in his Bentley, music was constantly playing. When his flat got too quiet, he’d put on something, usually slow paced. It depended on his mood, though.

Aziraphale always heard cars, horns, people, whatever else. That was all the sound he needed. He didn’t own a television, or anything like that besides a small radio in the backroom of his shop that he used to listen to the old composers.

But Crowley’s ears picked up something. It was a very faint tune. A music box sound coming from somewhere.

“Aziraphale,”

“Yes?”

“What’s that?”

“Oh, that’s the baby’s music player. He looked like he liked it.”

He thought back to what all was bought, but nothing like that came to mind. “I don’t remember buying a music player.”

“It was in the,” he made a spinning motion with his hands.

“Oh. Can we not have the music part?”

Aziraphale give him a disappointed look. “Why? I think it’s nice”

“It’s,” Crowley hesitated for a moment before continuing. “creepy. Imagine waking up at night and just hearing that.”

The angel chuckled. “My dear, I don’t think there’s anything for you to be afraid of.”

He knew he meant it as a joke, and you could say he was right, but Crowley was afraid of a few things, even though he’d never let his Angel know that.

**

The next morning, they took the baby out of his bed and sat him on a pillow on the couch. Crowley kept a milk bottle in his lap for whenever he started to get loud or rowdy. Aziraphale started moving things around the house, putting stuff up and such. He found a spot for Crowley’s plants in the large bedroom, and even put a tiny one in the nursery. He laughed at himself because he thought of a joke. With all of Crowley’s plants, the house itself might as well be a nursery. He kept it in his mind to tell to Crowley later.

With Aziraphale busy, that left Crowley with the baby. For the most part it was pretty easy, he was just like any human. But, he learned one valuable lesson- babies were gross.

“Ew, ew, ew, ew. ANGEL.”

“Yes!”

“HE’S VOMITED WHAT DO I DO.”

“Oh, Mrs.- Deidre said when that happens to sit him up, wipe him off, and get him a change of clothes!”

Crowley was panicking and he wasn’t sure where the baby wipes were. “WHERE ARE THE WIPES?”

“In the side of his bed, my dear! Here, I’ll get them for you,”

Crowley sat Raphael up, but then he was crying. He quickly jogged to where Aziraphale was and started digging through stuff trying to find a toy, because babies liked toys. Preferably one that makes a lot of noise. “Can you go handle that?” He asked Aziraphale.

“I don’t think he’d like that.”

“Why not?”

“Because he doesn’t like me,”

Crowley knew he’d bought a rattle and he knew it was with all of the other things. “What do you mean he doesn’t like you?”

“He always cries when I try to do things for him, it’s-“

“RATTLE.”

“Rattle?”

“Alright, it’s fine,” he takes the wipes from Aziraphale’s hands and shoots out of the room.

He heard Crowley talking to him, and lightly shaking the toy. The crying stopped. Aziraphale watched him as he gently handed Raphael the rattle, only to have the baby hit Crowley in the eye with it. Aziraphale held back laughter before going in to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOWIE WE GOT SOME WHOLESOME DAD STUFF
> 
> ik not a lot is happening,,, but I promise it picks up,,, I’m thinking about writing the next chapter as  
> ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨  
> Six Years Before the Apocalypse  
> ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
> 
> (Raphael would be five ;0)
> 
> What would you guys think ?!?!?!
> 
> Thanks for reading !!! xoxo


	7. Chapter 7

_Six Years Before the End of the World_

Crowley sat on the sofa and watched as Raphael and Adam threw lego blocks at each other. The weren’t doing any real harm, so why stop it? He liked to watch the two of them play around, having fun in whatever way children do. Aziraphale was busy in the kitchen, making a snack for the two of them in case they got hungry. Aziraphale and Crowley were watching Adam while Deidre and Arthor were out for their anniversary.

Recently, things have been in the middle ground between fast and slow.

Crowley would check in on who hell thought was the Antichrist by dressing in some type of disguise and casually spying on the other child who had been named Warlock, every month or so. More often than not, it was the postman. Warlock absolutely hated the postman, for whatever reason, and always hid behind the couch when Crowley had come to deliver the mail. That didn’t matter much, because both sides didn’t know any better. He would tell Aziraphale everything that he would need to know about the boy, and it would all go smoothly. No one suspected a thing, not even Deidre and Arthor, who they had been spending a good bit of time around.

It was mostly Aziraphale’s fault; but he loved the neighbors. They always volunteered to watch Raphael while they went out or if it was a slow day, one of them would call eventually to invite the two men over for tea. It was a lovely relationship that they had going on, but Crowley mostly just sat and listened. Or at least he did until a story was being told wrong. Then he had to get involved. Though, there was a bit of lying, mostly to himself. He thought they were very nice people, and very nice neighbors, but he could never tell anyone that. There would never be an end to it.

Raphael was a very smart and capable five year old. It was decided to not raise him around religion, because of how difficult it would be in the future; but he was happy, playful, and mostly kind. Aziraphale had been teaching him from a very young age that it’s always good to love and be kind to all living things. He had said that compassion was normal, and it was something all small boys should be taught. Crowley just went with it, if his angel enjoyed teaching him, so be it.

“Ow!”

“I’m sorry!”

Raphael started crying, but it was a soft kind of crying; the kind where there was no noise, just tears.

He sniffled and wiped his eyes. “It’s okay, you didn’t mean to.”

Crowley moved from the couch to crouch down next to Raphael. “Are you alright? What’s happened?”

“I’m okay, dad. Adam didn’t mean to hit me.”

“Alright, where does it hurt?”

He pointed to his eye.

“Well, it’ll only hurt for a little. I’m sure it’s gonna stop soon.” He ruffled his hair and stood back up. “Play nice.”

The boys nodded.

Crowley smiled to himself and sat down at the table; he watched Aziraphale slide some kind of pastry into the oven. “You know, you don’t have to do all that. They’re kids, I’m sure they’d enjoy some crisps.”

“Don’t be silly, I think this is much better for them. It’s apple pies! I think I did a very good job on them, too.” He grinned, which caused Crowley to immediately start smiling again. It was like a reaction that he couldn’t hide. “I’m sure you did.”

To keep himself busy, Aziraphale had started to practice baking. He still kept up with the bookshop, but since he wasn’t there as much, he needed a new hobby. When it was time for dinner, there was always a desert. It was usually for the good kids who finished all of their food, but sometimes on special occasions, it was for the good kids who finished some of their food but their dad gave them a big piece of whatever it was anyway.

“So, Angel, how's the business coming along?”

They mostly used words like that to talk about what’s been happening recently without Raphael or anyone else knowing what they’re talking about. It wasn’t very hard to hide themselves as celestial beings, though. They’ve had years to practice. The only thing that might be a problem is Crowley’s eyes. He knew children were naturally curious and wanted answers to literally everything they could think of, so it was probably just a matter of time before he asked, _dad, why do you wear sunglasses all the time?_

He thought of a lot of different answers.  
Like _, I just enjoy wearing them._  
_They look nice on me._  
_They have a lot of sentimental value._  
And _,_  
_My eyes are weird._

The only problem with all of these is that it would trigger another question, _why?_

Maybe when it was asked, he’d just shrug and say he doesn’t know. It seemed like the best way to go.

“Hm,” Aziraphale sat beside him at the table. “things have been going good. No one has really asked me anything I didn’t know, so from what I can tell no one is suspicious.”

Crowley nodded.

There was laughing from the living room followed by Raphael not-yelling-but-saying-loudly “Dad!”

“Yes?” Crowley spoke up.

“No, the other one.”

“Oh.” He nudged Aziraphale with his elbow.

He playfully rolled his eyes, something he picked up from Crowley, and got up from the chair.

**

Deirdre and Arthor came to pick up Adam around eleven p.m.

He was already asleep on the couch with Raphael beside him, who was still awake and watching something on the television.

The two told the other boy that he and his fathers could come over to their house tomorrow, if they’d like. He nodded and smiled at them.

“Again, thank you, Anthony and thank you, Aziraphale.” The two nodded and Aziraphale wished them a goodnight.

Originally, he was going to come up with a different name, something more simple, or human. But, Crowley called him Aziraphale besides Angel in front of them once and it stuck. For Crowley, when he first introduced himself, he said Anthony, mostly out of habit. Thankfully, they haven’t asked any questions about why Aziraphale calls him Crowley, or their “marriage.”

Everything was going smooth.

When Deidre and Arthor left, Aziraphale started cleaning up and Crowley put Raphael to bed. It looked a lot different than it used to. There were a lot more shelves and posters and a few picture books here and there, but there was still a small plant sitting on the table by his bed.

He turned on his night light and gave him a kiss on the forehead.

“Dad,”

“Hm?”

“Why don’t you and dad ever do anything,” he stopped for a second, trying to think of a word. “gross.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “Gross?”

“Yeah, Adam’s parents do gross stuff all the time. Or that’s what he tells me. Why don’t you?”

“Well, what is gross stuff for one thing?”

“Kissing and other stuff adults do. I’ve seen it on TV, too.”

He sat there for a minute, trying to think of what to say. “I guess we just never have.”

Raphael seemed content with this answer, so he sat up to give Crowley a small hug, then laid back down. “Goodnight.”

Crowley stood back up and went to the door. “Goodnight.”

He walked to his room changed into his sleeping robes. Well, not really changed, just more appeared. It was also a pro of being a demon. Aziraphale came in; he had also changed out of his usual clothes and was dressed in something that looked old but comfortable. Crowley had gotten him into a sleeping routine after a while. His lack of company at night made him feel lonely. So, he started sleeping every night, too.

They both got in their sides of the bed and Aziraphale set their alarm clock, so they don’t over sleep.

“He asked why we didn’t do anything gross.”

Aziraphale lightly laughed and looked to Crowley. “What does that mean?”

“He was wondering why we didn’t kiss and things like Adam’s parents.” He removed his sunglasses and sat them on the small table beside the bed.

“And what did you say?”

“That it wasn’t really our thing.”

They both laughed.

Aziraphale turned his bedside light off and Crowley did the same.

“Goodnight, Angel.”

“Goodnight, my dear.”

They had gotten so used to how the way things were now, it would be hard to go back to the way things were. But, they enjoyed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s Friday babey !!! You know what that mean ;)
> 
> Sorry if it kind of goes fast, I tried to fit some of the things we could have missed in five years here and there
> 
> Thanks for reading !!!


	8. Chapter 8

**_Hell_ **

Beelzebub stands in from of Hastur and crosses their arms in front of their chest. “You believe there’s something wrong?”

“Yes,”

“Can you explain one more time, but slower?”

“It has to do with the Antichrist; Crowley is up to something, I just know it.” Hastur paces back and forth with his hands shoved in his pockets.

“Have you talked to him?” 

“No, he’s never home lately. I’m starting to think he’s moved somewhere other than here.”

“He still comes to tell us about the Antichrist, and I don’t have a reason not to trust him, Hastur. Crowley has been the cause of most earthly inconveniences since he started living there. I’ll make sure to,” they stopped for a moment. “Check in on him.”

Hastur nodded. “Thank you, Lord.”

***

Aziraphale buckles Raphael into his car seat in the back of the Bently and gave him one of his toys. Crowley adjusts his sunglasses and pulls his long, red hair into a bun, keeping it out of his face. 

“Are we all ready?” He looks over to Aziraphale who smiles and gives him a thumbs up. 

Crowley smiles and pulls out of the driveway. 

Raphael had come home from school with very good grades and all good remarks from his teacher, and the two thought he should be rewarded with a trip to the zoo. But, that was a secret. 

Crowley turned up the radio to hear the first verse of Fat Bottomed Girls and frantically tried to change the song. Aziraphale tried to force down a laugh while he fumbled with the knobs.

“Dad, why can’t we listen to that one?”

“Because it might not be the best for you to listen to.”   
  


“But I like that one!”

At this point, Aziraphale was a giggling mess in the passenger seat.

“This there any  _ other _ song you want to listen to?”

Raphael stopped for a second before shrugging. 

“Excellent choice.” Crowley snapped his fingers and a sweet, smooth voice comes from the radio. 

_ “Can anybody find me somebody to love,” _

“What about this one?” 

“I like this one too,”

“Good,”

Crowley made sure to actually drive the speed limit, which he had gotten used to after a while because of how frequently Raphael was in the car. This was also a big plus for Aziraphale because this meant he didn’t have to hold on for dear life every time he was with him. 

There wasn’t a lot of talking on the way there, and Raphael never asked where they were going. He was curious, but he liked the adventure. Most of his interest went to the toy he had, and most of Crowley’s interest was what was in front of him, thankfully. 

Aziraphale had a sudden urge, though. Crowley only had one hand on the wheel, the other was resting in between them. Without really thinking about it, he slid his hand into Crowley’s and relaxed. But, Crowley’s reaction was a little different, though. He took in a very deep breath and jerked. Aziraphale took this as a bad sighed and started to pull his hand away, but Crowley squeezed and held it tighter. His whole face was almost as red as his hair, but he wasn’t bothered.

After they parked for the zoo, Raphael looked like he was going to explode. They paid and the woman gave them all a bracelet to wear, telling them to have fun. There were a good bit of people who were also mostly parents with their kids who were doing what children did- which was basically screaming.

Right away, Raphael started pulling Crowley and Aziraphale towards the big cats. He loved tigers and lions, but the tigers were his favorite. 

He stood in front of the glass and looked in, but there wasn’t anything.

“I can’t see.” 

Crowley pointed towards a ledge where a big tiger was sitting. “Right up there.”

“I think he means he isn’t _big_ _enough_ to see.” Aziraphale lifted him up and placed him on his shoulder. “Is that better?” 

“Oh my gosh! He’s huge!” Raphael’s hands tightened around Aziraphale’s curly hair and stared in awe. It was his first time seeing animals like this up close. 

Crowley on the other hand, was staring at something else. He was looking at his angel out of the corner of his eye, wondering if he should risk it and reach for his hand. After him finally coming to terms that his pining was nothing but an inconvenience, this happens. It was the closest thing to some kind of affection he’d gotten from Aziraphale and he didn’t know how to feel. He also didn’t know what it meant. Feelings couldn't be mutual or something would have been said by now, so the reason was unknown. He nearly let go of the steering wheel earlier. But, he knew it was now or never, so he slipped his hand into Aziraphale’s and laced their fingers through each other. Thankfully, there was minimal reaction. 

Through the whole day, the two switched Raphael around, but he mostly liked it on Crowley’s shoulders because he was taller. 

“Hey, why don’t we get a picture?” Aziraphale gestured to the man with a camera sitting at a table in front of a green background.

“Angel, you know we can just take a picture on my phone, right?”

“Maybe, but it’ll get developed here and we’ll be able to hang it with the rest of our pictures!” He smiled and waited.

There was just a sigh before him saying, “Alright,”

He brought out the money and paid, then stood in front of the background with Aziraphale and Raphael. 

“Ready?” The man moved to take their picture.

Aziraphale moved closer and leaned into Crowley’s side, who in returned lightly put an arm over the angel’s shoulder. 

“Ready?”

“Ready.”

_ Flash _

**

“Alright, dad is going to get us ice cream while you go use the little boy’s room, he’ll be back in a minute.” He took him down from Crowley’s shoulder’s and sat him on the ground.

The two walked into the restroom and Crowley went to grab the ice cream. However; before he made it there someone bumped shoulders with him hard enough to catch his attention. He spins around to see who it was and locks eyes with the prince of hell. He straightens up without a second thought and clears his throat.

“Hello, Lord.”

Beelzebub keeps eye contact as they step closer. “Hello, Crowley. I’m here to talk to you.” 

“What would we need to talk about?”

“Someone told me that they’re suspicious and that they don’t think you’re doing a very good job.”

Crowley shuffled on his feet and shoved his hands into his pockets. His heart felt like it was about to explode, but he made sure there was no way they could tell. He let them continue.

“Where have you been staying?”

Thankfully, he had these answered prepared already. 

“I’ve been staying in the same place, just moving around a lot.”   
  


“Why?”

“Felt like I needed a change.”

“Have you been keeping an eye on the Antichrist?”

“I still go by once every month.”

“And have you done anything lately?”

“That’s why I needed a change, my brain has been a bit fuzzy lately.”

“And the other side?”

“They don’t suspect a thing.”

Beelzebub waited for a moment before looking away. “We’ll be keeping in touch.”

“Of course, Lord.”

And then they were gone. Aziraphale stood in front of him holding Raphael’s hand with a look of fear on his face that Crowley will never forget. But, there was no talk, they just all went on their way to get Dippin’ Dots.

**

At home, Aziraphale hung their photo with all the others on the wall, which happened to fit perfectly. Raphael was in bed and kissed goodnight before any talk of what happened came up. Crowley explained the whole situation and then some, going in and explaining that he’d have to do a little more to make sure nothing happened. Aziraphale completely understood and with that, the house fell quiet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh !!! This chapter felt so dull to me >:/  
> I wasn't sure how to put everything into my head and continuing the events in this chapter into the other felt dumb   
> I'm so sorry if it wasn't as expected, but hey we got some kind of affection :00  
> I hope you liked it ;3


	9. Chapter 9

_ A cafe somewhere in London, five years later. _

“So, what you’re telling me is that your angel is messing around with one of our best demons?” Beelzebub leans back in their chair and looks at Michael.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.” Michael spread out photos from over the years of Crowley and Aziraphale in front of them, Gabriel crossing his arms with a smirk on his face. Beelzebub poked at their small cake and sighed.

“And what are you suggesting we do about this?”

“We confront them.” 

Beelzebub rolled their eyes and looked at Gabriel. “Can we have a minute.”

It was more of a statement than a question, and Michael understood that. She stood from her chair and walked out of the cafe, asking no questions.

“Listen, Garrison-”

“Gabriel,”

“Whatever. I’m willing to compromise; Crowley has been very active for Hell, not so much recently, but that isn’t the point. From what I can tell,” They gestured to the pictures. “Whatever is going on between him and your angel hasn’t impacted his work. I’ve been keeping in touch with him for a good bit, since one of my men lead me to believe that something was going on, I now see that it’s true, but that was a few years ago. I’m not sure if you could say the same for your angel, though.”

Gabriel watched in disgust as Beelzebub shoved half of their cake into their mouth and chewed. This wasn’t their first meeting, but it was the first time in a long time and the first time where neither of them was flooded by coworkers or in their respective offices. Neither of them looked any different to each other, though the last time Gabriel saw Beelzebub they had their hair very,  _ very _ , short along with a white button-down shirt with a tie that didn’t match. But, Gabriel had learned that no matter  _ where _ the two met, they didn’t know the definition of  _ casual. _

“The angel, Aziraphale. He’s a bit difficult, it’s like he’s been down here for too long. He’s gone a bit native.” He laughs a bit, expecting Beelzebub to join in. They do not. 

“You know, originally he was here just to guard an apple tree, but that didn’t work out very well. After that we kind of lost connection but I still would be forced to check in every once in a while because angels-”

“Anyway, what’s the point of this? What are you wanting to do? The Antichrist will come into power soon, and there  _ will _ be a war. So, what could these two do to mess that up? It’s not as if they have anything to do with it.” They twirled their fork around and sat up a bit more straight. They knew that Crowley made trips to visit the family, see what the boy was doing. He wouldn’t bring back much news. He did say once that he’d put a small firecracker in the toaster and managed to give one of the maids a heart attack, which seems like the right behavior for him to be showing. Crowley had also said that Heaven knew nothing about this, and wasn’t sure if they could trust him with that anymore. But, then again, if Heaven knew about this Gabriel would obviously say something. That’s just how angels were. This made them think Crowley had something else in mind. 

“I see where you’re coming from, but I think we should still make sure nothing funny is going on.”

“Tell me how you suggest we go about doing that.”

Gabriel smiled nervously and avoided eye contact. He stayed silent.

“Right. How about we don’t jump right into it. We could watch from a distance; see what’s happening.”

The two locked eyes and kept it that way until Beelzebub raised an eyebrow. “Well?”

“Are you suggesting we work together?”

“Are you going to just make hell watch after them? Because, if that’s the case I’ll go ahead and make my way out.”

They go to stand up.

“Wait,” Gabriel pinches the bridge of their nose. “Wait, listen. Wouldn’t we be doing the same thing they’re doing?”

“No, this is for business. Honestly, as much as you angels gloat about how wonderful you are, there isn’t a single brain cell in heaven, is there?”

He opened his mouth to say something rude back but turned it into a smile. “Then, in that case, it’s settled.”

Beelzebub stood up and held out their hand, which Gabriel gently took. They have it an aggressive shake. “Garrett,”

“Gabriel-”

“Sure.” They pulled their hand back, walked away and out the door. The bell above it let out a tiny  _ ding _ and Gabriel knew some bastard in heaven just got his new pair of wings.

***

“But _ Daaaad,”  _ Raphael sat at the kitchen table and watched as his father tried to figure out the answer to his maths homework. They had both been stuck on it for over thirty minutes and Crowley refused to use a calculator. Thing is, he’d already tried to use the calculator without Raphael knowing because he was Smart and Strong and he didn’t need it, but the thing is the calculator didn’t know the answer  _ either. _

Raphael sighed and tapped his pencil on the table, waiting for his other dad to get home. He was visiting his bookshop in Soho, just checking in and making sure everything was still in place. He did this on alternating Tuesdays. 

He slid the book away from Crowley and back towards him, closed it; and got out of his seat. “It’s ok, we only had one problem left anyway, I’ll just get my teacher to explain it.”

Crowley nodded, then took off his glasses momentary and rubbed his eyes. The way his pupils are shaped, along with his eyes, in general, aren’t really very good for reading or focusing in on closer things. It was true that he didn’t read, but it wasn’t because he didn’t want to. 

He pulled the hair tie out, causing the bun he had it in to fall to his shoulders. He’d been growing it out for some time now, just because he thought Aziraphale liked it long. He liked it long, but it was definitely a hassle considering the last time it was this length was around 1603. 

The door opened and Aziraphale stepped into the house, shaking off an umbrella that he certainly didn’t leave with. He smiled and sat it beside the door for later use. “Hello, my dear boy,”

Crowley glanced at the clock on the wall and smiled. “You’re home a bit later than usual, Angel. Something hold you up?”

“Many of the people who came by the shop on a regular basis were  _ very _ curious about where I disappeared to.”

“Did you tell them you moved to a small town with your terrible husband and ten-year-old son?” He made quotations around the word husband and put his glasses back on. 

Aziraphale didn’t say anything, just walked over and pecked Crowley’s cheek. It must have been loud enough to hear because Raphael made a very displeased “EW.” from his room. After a while, they had gotten used to showing affection, with both of them touch starved for centuries. But, even though they didn’t say it, neither of them knew if they should be grateful for this. Pinning for six thousand years and suddenly be able to treat that person as your spouse can be like going from zero to one hundred. 

Then there are times where questions come up, and there’s isn’t really a way to answer them. A few years back, Aziraphale saw Raphael looking at all the pictures hung on the wall, but not exactly in a happy way. He wanted looked to the angel and asked, with a lot of confusion, “Where is your and Dad’s wedding pictures?”

Aziraphale quickly tried to come up with an explanation, saying that even though they said they were husbands, he and Crowley hadn’t gotten married yet. He said saying they were married caused less confusion. He seemed to understand, and never asked again. The Young family, thankfully, never seemed to wonder anything about them, or at least not from what they could tell. That was good.

***

Crowley decided he didn’t want to see that night. Or the night before. Or even the night before that. Aziraphale knew why he was so stressed, but Raphael getting older couldn’t be helped. He was going to turn eleven someday, and that someday happened to be too close than what Crowley wanted it to be. 

“Pacing won’t help you,”

He ran his hands through his hair multiple times before sitting down at the end of the bed.

“Pacing is helping me, maybe not in the way I’d like it to.”

“Come lie down, it’ll help calm your nerves.”

He took the invitation and climbed into bed beside him. His nerves weren’t calm.

“Tell me what you’ve been thinking about recently, my dear.”

Crowley lightly threw his glasses on the bedside table and leaned back onto the headboard. “What if something happens to him? We don’t know. Anything could happen, all we know is he’s supposed to bring Armageddon, not how it’s going to affect the boy. He’s going to be the supreme overlord of the earth once Heaven and Hell brawl, but will he still be Raphael?”

Aziraphale closed the book he had in his lap and moved closer to Crowley. “The point of doing this was to make sure he  _ didn’t _ bring about the end of the world, remember? He hasn’t shown any signs of being evil, or cruel, or anything of that nature. There’s nothing to stress over, Crowley. It’s-”

“Ineffable, yeah,”

“What are you two talking about?” 

Both of their heads quickly whipped around to Raphael, who was standing in the doorway. 

Aziraphale smiled and opened his book back up and settled farther into the bed. “A television show we would watch. But, it’s nothing for you to worry about. What’s the matter, dear?”

“I can’t sleep.”

“I’ll fix you some warm milk,”

Raphael smiled for a quick second before stopping. “Chocolate.”

Aziraphale smiled back and nodded. “Warm  _ chocolate _ milk.” 

The boy lit up with happiness and raced to the kitchen. Before he got out of bed, Aziraphale took Crowley’s hand in his own and planted a small kiss on the top.

“It’ll be alright.”

  
Crowley’s eyes were focused on Aziraphale and he knew he looked at him like he was one of the very few things that’ve ever mattered to him. It felt like something was constricting his airflow, and he didn’t breath until Aziraphale was out of the room. He was  _ so close _ to leaning in, but he couldn’t. Not now. So instead, he fell back into his pillow and closed his eyes; making sure not to think about what could happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made it here on friday !!  
> Sorry it took so long, kind of wanted to fit other things into here and maybe clear up some stuff  
> Also I got my hair cut and I'm feeling butch and gay so that's the best nhjknhn  
> Thank you for reading xoxoxo


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